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Message Board > Miscellaneous > The Most Inexpensive Holiday Gift for Year Round Giving ( Moderated by Deepika, EleanorSews, CynthiaSue)

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The Most Inexpensive Holiday Gift for Year Round Giving
The Gift I Received from My Neighbor
a7yrstitch
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a7yrstitch  Friend of PR
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Date: 12/9/11 1:54 PM

Give a Hug!

Our appreciation for the solid structure and value to be found in an older home has found us, in each of our three homes, in older neighborhoods. And, as a result, we've always had older neighbors, usually folks who bought their homes when the neighborhood was formed.

Hubbie and I came from families that were not physically affectionate. It took practice, but we were able to turn that around within our family unit.

Once we lost my wonderful stepfather, we even decided to tuck my mom in with a good night kiss and hug when she visited.

But, I was still reserved, very, very reserved.

It was living in Pennsylvania that changed that. We had moved from a small cul-de-sac neighborhood to a much larger neighborhood with a multitude of neighbors in their 70's and 80's and some in their 90's.

Our 70 something neighbor came to introduce herself immediately and also apologized for any noise that might be coming from the house. She cared for her Dad who had Alzheimer's and she said sometimes he got a little loud at night and we shouldn't worry. She was doing this alone as her husband had died and both her children lived in another state.

She made me realize that I had no right to be reserved. That if I didn't give my neighbor a hug that it could be months, maybe a year before she received a hug from anyone. That was her gift to me, the lesson to share myself in a different way.

It may take some easing into, but if you have a friend or neighbor who is not receiving regular hugs, try to share with them. It will be a gift for both of you.


-- Edited on 12/9/11 2:43 PM --

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Miss Fairchild
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In reply to a7yrstitch


Date: 12/9/11 3:14 PM

The thing that stuck out the most for me when I read this was It was living in Pennsylvania that changed that. It was when I too moved to Pennsylvania that I became less reserved. I too grew up in a non-responsive family, as well as with a few other problems, so friendships--and trust--were hard for me. But once I moved and saw kind people, I learned that to have a friend was to be one. It's with my friends, and most recently the daughter of my friend who passed, that I give those hugs to. In fact, when I brought my friend's daughter some vegetarian chili, as well as made her a pie, she was ever so grateful that she gave me a hug! And that was her gift to me; but I was doing just what I felt was normal.

Thank you for sharing your story on how to share something so inexpensive, and rewarding, as a hug.

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Sherril Miller
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Date: 12/9/11 5:45 PM

I'm from a family of huggers. As a teacher of middle school students, I am supposed to be hands off with my students. However, some days you just know when a student needs a hug and I have no problem giving them a hug. I know that for that student, it might be the only hug they get from an adult all day, or even week. I give my son a hug every morning and when he gets home from school--and he's 17 years old. I hope I'm passing this on to him. It's something that my husband is still not comfortable with but he puts up with my hug demands without too much complaining. Maybe I should send him to Pennsylvania.

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poorpigling

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In reply to a7yrstitch


Date: 12/9/11 7:46 PM


Back at you.

Thanks for the reminder that we all need from time to time..

And why not be generous with them, they cost nothing. and require no diet or exercise..

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