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Message Board > Miscellaneous > Should I give up PR ( Moderated by Deepika, EleanorSews, CynthiaSue)

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Should I give up PR
Or is there a better way?
rivergum
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rivergum
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Date: 4/8/12 6:19 PM

I sew a lot. It is to the point now where I don't like to admit that I have been sewing when someone happens to ask. Usually I make one or two garments on a weekend. That takes about 2 half days or more. I resent time spent socialising or goint to see a movie etc.

DH, who is a lovely and generous man, is getting a bit fed up, saying he would like some company to do things on the weekend once in a while. He has a point. Relationships need looking after.

Money doesn't came into it, it's the time spent. I work full time in our business, I tend to knit in the evenings, so the only time I have to sew is on the weekends. I am always busy and rushing, never enough time for eveything I want to do. I haven't made time to relax for ages and I am running myself ragged.

Why do I do it? My wardrobe is full to bursting point. I don't need more clothes, but I love beautiful textiles and the challenge of making something work. When I see something I like, I just love to work out a way to make something similar, maybe even better. I adore planning projects, and there is no point unless the project is actually put into action. And then I am possibly just a tiny bit OC...

I hate to say it, but PR is playing a large part in feeding my habit. is all that inspiration more than I can handle? I have learnt so much in all sorts of ways and what I am turning out now is giving me a lot of pleasure. But is it all too much of one thing?

If I went cold turkey, closed the sewing room door and stayed away from PR I think I could achieve more of a balance, but it's a bit drastic. Does anyone have a better suggestion to rein in my rampant creative urges? Any other sewing tragics out there who have a pearl of wisdom or two to pass on?


------
Taking in is happier than letting out.

Sydney, Australia

Lena Merrin
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Lena Merrin
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Date: 4/8/12 6:45 PM

HelloI think you should do what you enjoy. And if sewing makes you happy, then this is what you need to do. I don't think you are challenging yourself enough, though. Two garments a weekend sounds a bit quick and easy. How about starting a complex project with many details and split it into several weekends, completing a small part each time to perfection?

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www.iconicpatterns.com

mastdenman
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mastdenman  Friend of PR
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Date: 4/8/12 7:03 PM

I don't think you need to give up PR and sewing in their entirety, but DH needs attention too. So try to carve out some time to spend with your hubby.

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Marilyn

January 2009 to January 2010 81 yards out and 71yards in January 2010 to the present 106.7 yards out and 146.5 yards in. January 2011 to the present: 47 yards out and 69 yards in.

Miss Fairchild
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In reply to rivergum <<


Date: 4/8/12 7:08 PM

I'm chuckling as I'm reading your post as I too once had this question, but for different reasons. Realize your strengths in sewing and explain to DH that PR is what gave them to you. Then spend some time with him too. I love to sew, and can't stand a day without hearing my machine. So if you spend maybe 20 minutes a day in your sewing room, DH won't feel so left out. That way, your addiction will be satisfied, and hubby will be happier. Maybe the two of you can go to buy your next machine?

------
"Play the cards you are dealt, but choose who is sitting at the table"..AARP magazine

SEE MY ETSY SHOP HERE: http://www.etsy.com/shop/AuntMaymesAttic
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Cerisa
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Date: 4/8/12 7:11 PM

I just want to say you start the best threads! I know that you are also responsible for the no sugar one.

Elona
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Date: 4/8/12 7:48 PM

Quote:
I haven't made time to relax for ages and I am running myself ragged.


The key might be in that phrase. And it's entirely possible that the answer may not be easily accessible even for someone as self-aware as you clearly are.

If your husband says he wishes he could spend more time with you, he has been thinking about this for a while, because this kind of utterance is difficult for most guys.

The years pass too quickly, believe me. I would suggest a few sessions (probably only a few would be needed) with a therapist to get to the root of too little time in a day, and maybe too little time in a life.

Kris O
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Kris O
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Date: 4/8/12 7:56 PM

Could you make something for your husband? That would include him in the process somewhat and could be a good compromise.

------
You will do foolish things, but do them with enthusiasm.
--Sidonie Gabrielle Colette

GlButterfly

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In reply to rivergum <<


Date: 4/8/12 8:00 PM

Raffle off some of that energy and sewing. There are many at PR who have lost some of their sewing mojo and can't seem to get it back fully!

You'll be happy with the money collected, hubby will be happy with your new attention to him, and the winners will be happy. Win-win situation.

How long has this been going on? Possibly it's just a phase and a year from now you may not even be going in your sewing room.

------
I have not yet begun to procrastinate

Update: soon I will decide when I will begin procrastinating.

tourist
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tourist  Friend of PR
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In reply to rivergum <<
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Date: 4/8/12 8:15 PM

rivergum - you work together in your business? That can make spending time together a challenge. I have known people in similar situations who just want to spend their down time with someone else doing something else, in spite of a happy and enjoyable relationship with the family member.

Sounds to me like you need a plan and you need a commitment to do something that you both enjoy together. Dinner and movies somehow don't do it for me. You need a little distance from work and home and you need an activity that lets you enjoy each other where you can chat if you want to or not. And you may want to make it not a task like gardening or home improvement because it is still "work." Walking, boating, fishing, art gallery viewing, theater, concerts. Of course, I recommend dancing of any sort!

How about a little challenge? Each of you is responsible to find a cheap, easy and enjoyable activity that you can do in a weekend morning or afternoon. You do something he chooses on Saturday morning and he does your activity Sunday afternoon, or something of that sort. Enjoy each other a little bit. As someone else said, life is short.

------
http://bgballroom.wordpress.com to follow the progress on my next ballgown.

mssewcrazy
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Date: 4/8/12 8:51 PM

Hmmm maybe take off an afternoon to sew during the week sometimes and spend the weekend afternoon with him in an activity. I worked in our family business and the hours were longer and the work harder than you could ask of a hired person. Sounds as if being run ragged strikes a familiar chord here. If you only sew during the weekend and get the family business job and the home taken care of then weekend sewing may be your only way to stay sane. I worked as a teacher for 10 years and then at our own business so I have a good basis to compare. It really doesn't help that those in the community and church think that self employed can just take off from work willy nilly since they own it. Hired people get days off sometime so put in a request for occasional sew time for a few hours during the week so you can do your hobby or home chores and do the family time activity on the weekend. Families in business don't watch the clock when working. Does he help with the at home chores like the cleaning,cooking, etc,? I used to ask dh to do nothing in that respect and I see the young people do things a lot differently in sharing the chores. If he helped you could be through quicker and have time to spend with him and sew some so you both would enjoy the weekend. Now I insist dh do a few things here. Not much as he wasn't trained well in our younger years. If I could go back in time we would have more time to do things as he would be doing some of the chores-together with me for quality time. Lol!

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