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Social etiquette
What would you do? (look away if squeamish)
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UNITED KINGDOM
Member since 7/19/13
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Date: 1/29/14 2:11 PM

Fairly regularly we have lunch in a place with good food and great service. For the last few years some others have joined us after we've finished our meal, to do a quiz. It is printed in the newspaper which we bring with us. If no-one else joined us, we'd do it together anyway. The others seem to really enjoy it, because they always say (while we're eating) Are you doing the quiz?

Usually I'm the only woman. I ask every week, but the response is always the same: they want me to be the quizzer - reading out questions. (Note that this protocol means that I never get quizzed myself, but leaving that aside ftm....)

So far, so what?

One of the other men, in his late 60s, picks his nose throughout, every single time. He does it with his thumb as if that makes any difference. He does it even when I am looking directly at him.

I find this disgusting and have said so to everyone else - so they are all aware of my distaste (to put it mildly). The other men don't seem to give a hoot if one day I SAY SOMETHING which makes the nose-picker storm off? (Would he?)

I would feel sorry for his wife being married to such a slob, but on the other hand, why hasn't she stopped this appalling public behaviour already? It isn't tolerated in teenagers, is it?

Yes, we'll keep going there because of the good food and service. But I don't know what I'm going to do when he starts picking his nose next week, again, which he will.

Any ideas? thanks.

MrsCharisma
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Date: 1/29/14 3:04 PM

I think that is absolutely abhorrent.

I would rally the men to say something. "they" in general seem better able to take direct hits (so to speak) from each other without offense.

------
Nakisha
www.sewcraftychemist.blogspot.com
Singer Talent 3321 | Brother 1034D

My Big 4 Sizing: Medium | Tops 14/16 | Pants 18 | Skirts 16/18.

My Measurements: 36 HB | 38.5 FB | 34 W | 44 Hip

Pinkytoo
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Date: 1/29/14 3:08 PM

Next time the first quiz question should be, "Can you name someone who has the disgusting habit of picking his nose in a public setting?"

See if he guesses correctly...

------
Sewing is my therapy!

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UNITED KINGDOM
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In reply to Pinkytoo <<


Date: 1/29/14 3:18 PM

Quote: Pinkytoo
Next time the first quiz question should be, "Can you name someone who has the disgusting habit of picking his nose in a public setting?"



See if he guesses correctly...

Good idea!

The questions always go in the form of: (since I can see the answers and they need some help........ don't ask)

'Two words, 4-5' (meaning, first word has 4 letters, second word has 5 letters)

So: Two words, 4-5, name someone who has the disgusting habit of picking his nose in public?

But will I have the nerve so to do?

rebeccajay
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Date: 1/29/14 3:18 PM

Oh. My.

That is quite an interesting problem to have. Just the thought turns my stomach. I like the previous suggestion to ask one of the men to say something. What an uncomfortable situation to be in. I feel for you!

Let us know how it goes!

------
Rebecca

Brand new to sewing. Got a Viking Emerald 118 from my wonderful hubby for Christmas 2013. Looking forward to learning from you all!

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UNITED KINGDOM
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In reply to MrsCharisma <<


Date: 1/29/14 3:20 PM

Quote: MrsCharisma
I think that is absolutely abhorrent.



I would rally the men to say something. "they" in general seem better able to take direct hits (so to speak) from each other without offense.

Hi Mrs Charisma

I've asked them when he is absent. They won't.

dmh1
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Date: 1/29/14 3:21 PM

I had a manager once that did that and it really grossed me out. However, I eventually found out that in the culture that he was brought up in it was considered a basic habit of well groomed people, so I at least was able to look at it from that perspective. However, in the U.S. we generally consider it unacceptable to do this a.) in public, and b.) without a tissue

Could the man in question simply have been raised with different sensibilities?

------
Michelle

SM: Janome DC2013 & Singer Futura Quintet
Serger: Janome Magnolia 7034D
Coverstitch: Singer 14T968DC

Pinkytoo
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Date: 1/29/14 3:30 PM

You could leave off the "disgusting" part if you don't want to be too harsh...

But knowing men, they will all laugh and think you are trying to be funny and NOT GET IT if you don't just come out and say it!

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Sewing is my therapy!

lkmbpk
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Date: 1/29/14 3:32 PM

Quote:
I eventually found out that in the culture that he was brought up in it was considered a basic habit of well groomed people


In what culture is picking your nose in public considered acceptable?

I once had a Chinese office partner that thought passing gas very loudly was acceptable. It wasn't to me and I asked my supervisor to move me to another office - and I told him why.
He was also Chinese and told me that that was not part of their culture, the guy was just rude.

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Date: 1/29/14 3:32 PM

Yup.

------
For photos of sewn garments and other sew crazy thoughts see my Tumblr blog andygrl.tumblr.com :)

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