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Why can some adults remember growing up better than others? (Moderated by Deepika, EleanorSews)
Posted on: 7/14/10 2:27 PM ET
I'm curious about long-term memory or a lack thereof. Does an adult remember childhood events more easily because the are repeated over the lifetime with family (siblings and parents) or does that have nothing to do with why we might remember things 50 yrs. later. Would an only child have a harder time with childhood memories when asked, because it's the first time they had to think about that particular incident since they were a child? I'm not talking about repressing major childhood trauma or events here, just common things like "the first time you road a bike or learned to cook". Why can some easily remember those things and others struggle? I'm interested if only child syndrome hinders long-term memory (or not), and, if not, what other reasons might. Any PHD's or MSW's out there knowledgeable in memory?
Posted on: 7/14/10 2:59 PM ET
In reply to hazelnut
My brother is 2 years younger than me. He has no memory earlier than age 8 or so. I can remember back to when my brother came home from hospital and mum was nursing him. Mum only nursed for 3 months, so I was about 2 and a half then.
My dh can remember way back, buy my bil (4 years older) does not remember any of his childhood.
Dh and I each have one brother.
My dad is an only, who is also the child of immigrant parents. He never had any family around, as in cousins, aunt, uncles, grandparents. I am estranged from him, but never remember him talking about anything before he was 16.
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My dh can remember way back, buy my bil (4 years older) does not remember any of his childhood.
Dh and I each have one brother.
My dad is an only, who is also the child of immigrant parents. He never had any family around, as in cousins, aunt, uncles, grandparents. I am estranged from him, but never remember him talking about anything before he was 16.
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Living life to the fullest.
Who knew being a Granny was the best thing ever?
Who knew being a Granny was the best thing ever?
Posted on: 7/14/10 5:31 PM ET
In reply to hazelnut
I can't answer your question (sounds like it could serve as the basis for at least 20 different thesis topics!), but I do know that some of what we remember is by choice and some of it isn't. I have no idea what makes me remember walking to school when I was about 7 years old (I have actual memories of some of what I was thinking about). But I do know that when I was a teenager I made a very conscious decision to remember how generally cr@ppy it had felt to be an adolescent, because I had noticed that most adults seemed to have lost all understanding of what it was like to be anything other than an adult. I think (or hope) this conscious decision helped me be a slightly more understanding mother... I don't know.
I don't know why they really would -- SOME only children live in a very them-centered environment; for these people, the memories of some things might even be more pronounced, since they were perhaps the central focus of the family's attention. I realize this isn't the case for all only children, and I don't mean it to sound unkind. My father was an only child, and I believe this was pretty much his experience. You'd be amazed how much detail he remembered of his childhood!
-- Edited on 7/14/10 5:41 PM --
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Quote:
Would an only child have a harder time with childhood memories when asked,
Would an only child have a harder time with childhood memories when asked,
I don't know why they really would -- SOME only children live in a very them-centered environment; for these people, the memories of some things might even be more pronounced, since they were perhaps the central focus of the family's attention. I realize this isn't the case for all only children, and I don't mean it to sound unkind. My father was an only child, and I believe this was pretty much his experience. You'd be amazed how much detail he remembered of his childhood!
-- Edited on 7/14/10 5:41 PM --
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my shield and my very great reward ~ Gen. 15:1
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
If you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid. ~ Albert Einstein
People have a way of becoming what you encourage them to be, not what you nag them to be. ~ Scudder N. Parker
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
If you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid. ~ Albert Einstein
People have a way of becoming what you encourage them to be, not what you nag them to be. ~ Scudder N. Parker
Posted on: 7/14/10 6:02 PM ET
Michelle and Joan,
Thanks, interesting answers. Certainly seems, from both your explanations, that how much one remembers is pretty random and childhood memory probably has nothing to do with the sharing of those events with family members repeatedly over the years. When I tried to search online I got a lot of info on dementia and short term memory glitches but nothing on difficulty calling-up benign childhood memories/events. It certainly would be a good thesis and I'm sure it's been done - not by me however - I don't have that kind of smarts. LOL Thanks
Thanks, interesting answers. Certainly seems, from both your explanations, that how much one remembers is pretty random and childhood memory probably has nothing to do with the sharing of those events with family members repeatedly over the years. When I tried to search online I got a lot of info on dementia and short term memory glitches but nothing on difficulty calling-up benign childhood memories/events. It certainly would be a good thesis and I'm sure it's been done - not by me however - I don't have that kind of smarts. LOL Thanks
Posted on: 7/14/10 6:21 PM ET
In reply to hazelnut
Quote:
Certainly seems, from both your explanations, that how much one remembers is pretty random and childhood memory probably has nothing to do with the sharing of those events with family members repeatedly over the years.
Certainly seems, from both your explanations, that how much one remembers is pretty random and childhood memory probably has nothing to do with the sharing of those events with family members repeatedly over the years.
Hmm, but I DO think sharing events with others over the years has something to do with how much we remember. I didn't venture into that part of your question, except to say that I don't think an only child would necessarily have a harder time remembering childhood events. I think most people are very influenced by the stories families tell about events, and we keep kind of a catalogue of these things in our memories -- especially of stories that get told over and over.
-- Edited on 7/14/10 6:22 PM --
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my shield and my very great reward ~ Gen. 15:1
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
If you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid. ~ Albert Einstein
People have a way of becoming what you encourage them to be, not what you nag them to be. ~ Scudder N. Parker
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
If you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid. ~ Albert Einstein
People have a way of becoming what you encourage them to be, not what you nag them to be. ~ Scudder N. Parker
Posted on: 7/14/10 6:41 PM ET
In reply to Vintage Joan
You're right, I probably should have said that it "doesn't have as much to do with" instead of "nothing to do with". Those were my initial thoughts when I posted the question. I realize as people age our health and environment (illness, medications, isolation, whatever) can affect our memory. Guess the bottom line is if by not having good childhood "recall" might someone be prone to any form of dementia, or in the case of an only child, might that lack of specific memories be more of a social thing than a brain-illness thing. (if that makes sense). 
I'm getting in over my head here LOL

I'm getting in over my head here LOL
Posted on: 7/14/10 6:53 PM ET
The first thing I can remember is when I was about 1 1/2 - we had a big aquarium, and I recall clinging to the side of the stand looking up at the angel fish. I have a lot of memories from throughout my childhood until reaching about age 10, and then again from my college years and up. My teen years were so horrible that I've actively tried to suppress any memories from that time, and in large part I've been successful (thankfully). So, I think what you remember - or don't - may have some choice involved.
Beth
Beth
Posted on: 7/14/10 7:12 PM ET
In reply to hazelnut
You might interested in seeing this article from the American Psychological Association entitled The Culture of Memory.
This article suggests that cultural differences (valuing independence versus valuing interdependence), as well as whether the adults in a child's life discuss the child's personal experiences, influences the (earliest) age at which children store memories. --Lily
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This article suggests that cultural differences (valuing independence versus valuing interdependence), as well as whether the adults in a child's life discuss the child's personal experiences, influences the (earliest) age at which children store memories. --Lily
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Lily
Posted on: 7/14/10 8:19 PM ET
In reply to hazelnut
The nature of memory--what is involved in the formation of memory, and why something is remembered--is not understood at all. There are people with remarkable memories for everything that ever happened in their lives. No one knows why they remember all of it.
Some people excel at remembering apparently insignificant stuff or data.
I had an unusual childhood, living in remarkably isolated surroundings with no other kids around to share info with, yet I remember a long way back, inclluding the physical and emotional sensations, as well as my surroundings, when I spoke my first complete sentence (I recall the experience as work, and extremely intense). My childhood memories are full and detailed from age two onwards, though nothing like the phenomenal ability described in the USA Today story. Since I was alone, the persistence of these memories cannot be explained by hashing them over with others.
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Some people excel at remembering apparently insignificant stuff or data.
I had an unusual childhood, living in remarkably isolated surroundings with no other kids around to share info with, yet I remember a long way back, inclluding the physical and emotional sensations, as well as my surroundings, when I spoke my first complete sentence (I recall the experience as work, and extremely intense). My childhood memories are full and detailed from age two onwards, though nothing like the phenomenal ability described in the USA Today story. Since I was alone, the persistence of these memories cannot be explained by hashing them over with others.
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Elona
Posted on: 7/14/10 9:18 PM ET
I'm an only and my first memory is at age 4 years old. After age 4 I remember lots of stuff.
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Marilyn
January 2009 to January 2010 81 yards out and 71yards in January 2010 to the present 106.7 yards out and 146.5 yards in. January 2011 to the present: 47 yards out and 69 yards in.
January 2009 to January 2010 81 yards out and 71yards in January 2010 to the present 106.7 yards out and 146.5 yards in. January 2011 to the present: 47 yards out and 69 yards in.
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